Oh my God. I was spending my evening downloading some porn and playing some classic arcade emulations. I admit that I am a geek so no need to point it out. The point here was that I was randomly downloading various old arcade games to amuse my drunk ass with when it occured to me how much homo-erotica was crammed into multitudes of these male-dominated creations. The one I am going to speak on tonight is Blade Master.

Hi fellas! Anyone wanna rub lotion on me?

As with many arcade games for you damn fairies, you can select one of two scantily clad barbarian men to satisfy not only your blood lust, but also your repressed homosexual tendencies. As always, one character is smaller and more agile, giving you brute types a little prison bitch to make jump around and perfrom feats of dexterity that will get your controlling members all hot and bothered. The other character is what concerned me the most though. He is a large man, wearing nothing but a G-String. Not only that but he is carrying (I shit you not) a spear and a morning star. For you normal people, a morning star is one of the many "street names" for a ball and chain. That is right, this huge representation of near-nude man is toting a ball and shaft as his weapons of choice. I marvel at how it is that this escaped my attention sooner.

As I run through a history of the male-dominated media forum of video games I encounter numerous pro-dick characters and their weak female counterparts. The older games are almost entirely overrun with massive numbers of guys wearing very little and acting in violent, maculine ways. This concerns me. I know that most of you out there have hidden any interest you have in the same sex, but now it is coming out in your entertainment. For those of us with no problem about our sexuality, I cannot allow this to go on. Why? I ask to the sky. Why do you need to hide behind these ridiculous parodies of impossibly sexual men to explore your internal schizm? Is it really so frightening to entertain sexual thought about the same gender? Must you geeky fucks turn to whatever excuse you can find to control some fella in a mass of thrusting adventures to release that tension within you? Can't you do like most kids your age and while everyone is in the dugout rub up against Tim, the muscular Catcher on your little league team? My god. I was just taken aback by this revelation. Endless streams of games built by guys for guys and full of boys. Women play an objectified role to keep the cock-oggling quest driven by pussy. They are weak and timid, or occassionally strong but still touting massive tits and long legs. What is it in our nation that requires this? I know this has been a wandering essay, but I just don't know what to think about this. I know there is a litte interest in homosexuality in every male, but I had no idea it was so severe that we needed any outlet. I had no clue that we were this afraid of looking at a man as a seuxal being. My lord we are insecure.